5. Getting Physical in Your Writing | Bust a Move: choreographing your action scene

Writing physicality in your fiction, from the gesture to the fight.

Jan 17, 2025

If you haven’t read the previous parts of this series, go back and check them out. Each post in this craft series builds on the previous one, as do the writing exercises included in them.

Feel free to skip the introduction and jump to the post, below the graphic, unless you’d like a quick reminder of the idea behind the series.

Welcome

We want our characters to come to life on the page, so that they can live in the reader’s mind, even beyond the covers of our books. Some of this is accomplished through the character’s personality, dialogue, interiority, and backstory, but much of it will be made or broken through the action occurring in scene, when our characters are actually living: walking, talking, and otherwise being physical beings in a physical world.

In this craft series, we’re going to be looking at action—from the small moment to the big fight—as a means to study writing physicality into scenes. Our characters, like us, express their bodily self in all sorts of ways, small and large, from the slight tilt of the head to the maximum effort of crossing the finish line at the end of a marathon (or ultra marathon, if you prefer). In thinking about and practicing action scenes, we get to play with physicality writ large. Literally. But the craft we learn and integrate into our personal knowledge banks will apply to every word we assign to our character’s physical presence on the page.

Note, I will be talking about action scenes, but I don’t only mean fights, chases, and narrow escapes. I mean scenes in which human action is our primary focus.

Ready?

How this series works

Every Tuesday and Friday, I will post a new piece in this craft series. When the series ends, I’ll find another subject I want to go into in depth, and plan the next series of posts.

Each post will build on the last. Along the way, although not necessarily in every piece, I will give you a writing assignment. The assignment will not be a prompt, as in here’s a writing prompt; go set a timer and free write. It will be an assignment to think, develop, and practice your craft. If I ask you to sketch something out, do some journaling, outlining, or rough pre-writing. If I say to free write or write, start thinking in terms of scenes and narrative. Each time I give you an assignment, it will build on what came before, so that you can practice what we’re studying. At the end of the series, if you’ve done the assignments, you’ll have something to show for it.

What will you have? Let’s find out. And be sure to let me know in the comments!

Speaking of comments, please let me know how it’s going all along the way. Share your thoughts and ask questions. I will be checking in and answering you.

5. Bust a Move: Choreographing your scene

Small physicality, like the gesture or facial expression, doesn’t need to be choreographed. Although you should give even those movements some consideration, because they are part of characterization. If you’re going to have your protagonist erupt in rage, figure out what that looks like and be true to your character. An eruption for some people looks like arms folded over the chest and brow lowered over a scowl. Done well, a lot of intensity can be communicated in a very small physical space. But we’re going to get moving today, putting those bodies into motion, and it all begins with choreography, planning the sequence of movements we will then translate into words on the page.

We writers block our characters’ movements all the time, mostly unconsciously. We think, this line would be better delivered standing than sitting, and type: He rose to his full, imposing height and leaned over his desk, pointing at June as he snarled, “You’d better fix it.” When it comes to complex movements that involve the setting in a meaningful way or engage one character bodily with one another, whether that’s a chase, dance, fight, or sex scene, choreography becomes part of the writer’s process.

Your Assignment:

As you read on, actually stop and do everything listed with a bullet point. For instance, if it says, “Who is going to be in this scene?”, jot down your characters’ names.

Suppose we need to craft a good, old-fashioned fight scene. Nothing fancy, just a couple of guys throwing punches. There are a few things we need to know:

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• Who is going to be in this scene? Sometimes fights break out between a good and bad guy, but sometimes the characters are just flawed humans. While only one can be the main character, we might like and sympathize with both of them.

• Why are they fighting? Motivation matters and affects how someone fights. Be specific about both characters’ reasons and objectives. The more complex the characters’ relationship and the more nuanced their motivations to fight, the more our own clarity while we write matters.

• Where are they fighting? What props are at hand? Think about the physical environment not only in terms of obstacles and weapons, but also in terms of stakes and tension. There is the old vase smashed over the head move. But, what if the vase is a valuable heirloom? The only memento your character has of her mother, lovingly filled with flowers each week, something treasured that will be mourned once shattered? The prop just took on significance in the scene.

Years ago, I wrote a story, titled “Creatures,” that ends in a fist fight in a dingy little kitchen. The shape of the room and its furnishings define how the fight plays out, because the movement is restricted by its small size, the characters hemmed in by the table and refrigerator. Larry, whose home it is, has one small pleasure in life: collage-making. The table is covered in his art.

That art has value to him, which means its presence in the scene increases the stakes: what does he stand to lose or gain? Well, he could be humiliated, get a broken nose, or worse. What does he stand to lose or gain that he really cares about? His collage. Know what I did with that prop during the fight? You bet I did!

Putting bodies in motion and depicting characters’ movement in words can be tough. We want the language to be exciting and fresh, but also visual and clear. We want the reader to track every muscle twitch, but can’t slow the action down. We want the details without the info dump. So, how do we accomplish all that?

• Picture your action in slow motion. Think through your sequence and list every necessary move the characters make.

• Look over your list. What moves shape the action by escalating or turning the stakes? For example, my character Larry, might be backing away from a fight, until Norman, his opponent, crushes his collage. That movement will change the course of the action, because now Larry is going to engage.

• Really think about the points of contact in your action sequence. If Norman punches Larry, what is the size differential? How big or forceful is Norman? Does he have fighting skills? What about Larry? Being mechanical about the sequence now will get it all clear in your head, so when you draft the action, you can focus on the flow and pace of your description.

• Factor in your setting. Is Larry slammed against the counter or sent careening down a hallway? Is he in a position to pick up his scissors or a kitchen knife during the fight? Is there something spilled on the floor that he and Norman could slip on?

• Before you draft your scene, get in touch with the emotional tension you want the reader to feel. Label it: frightened, angry, disgusted, relieved? These scenes need to be about more than fists flying if they are to advance more than plot.

• Look over that list again. What movements or physicality can you write into the scene to enhance dramatic tension and the reader’s empathetic and visceral connection to the action? Action scenes, like every scene, are not just about the bodies in motion, not even really about the bodies in motion. Some of the details we script will be about the movement and clarity of action, others will be about the effect they have on the reader. In other words, create subtext.

• One more thing before you draft. You’ve got your outline, identified the key moments, factored in the setting, and named the reader’s emotional experience. Now, think back to Freytag’s Pyramid. The shape of your scene should be a mini-pyramid. The action begins, ramps up, climaxes, and resolves. Think through the basic shape of your scene, its beginning, middle, and end.

This looks like a lot of work when it’s all broken down and spelled out in this granular fashion. And it is. But like so much else we do, much of it can be computed in moments as our incredible minds shape our scenes. The more often we write action, the more adept we become at the whole process.

Breaking it down is helpful for two things: learning and assessing. Being consciously competent ensures we really know what we’re doing and not just getting lucky sometimes. Every writer, no matter how skilled or practiced, has to revise. When we need to figure out why an action scene isn’t working and fix it, having the process spelled out gives us a map with a key to assess and solve our craft problems.

• Draft your scene. Do a 20-minute freewriting session and see what happens. Or treat this assignment like you would a scene in your work-in-progress. Write it for real, for readers.

I’d love to know if this series is helping you. Please share questions, comments, and let me know how it went!

Do you have a favorite action scene from a novel? Please share.